Dying to be perfect

August 29, 2018
Lucy Mecklenburgh

I read this late last night and honestly it really upset me, angered me and frustrated me... 

A British mother suffered THREE heart attacks before dying after a 'bottom lift' at a cosmetic surgery clinic because she was paranoid about her appearance after having her 3 children - Daily Mail - read more   Firstly, my hugest sympathies go out to her poor family, her children and friends as it’s an awful tragedy.   My frustration is that these sort of operations are becoming the norm. We are all free to do what we want to our bodies, of course. But what are we striving for? Confidence? Looking like our role model? A never ending ladder towards perfection!?

So often that perfect Instagram shot is an illusion which may have been heavily edited anyway, so is simply unachievable and basically a cartoon body & face!   Bum implants, lipo, boob jobs, lip fillers  & botox are becoming as readily available as getting your nails done now - It's a 100's of million pound industry in the U.K!   Although I’m not for or against surgery. What’s to blame for making us believe we need surgery as the go to solution? Why should our boobs defy gravity, why do I need a big bum, a thigh gap and bigger lips?

Some people want to blame Celebrities for this rise in plastic surgery. But for all of the young celebrities I know, they are a part of this new wave of low self esteem, that seems to be sweeping through us, not the culprits or the causes of it.

They (we) are feeling exactly the same pressure to be better, bigger somewhere, smaller somewhere else - more "perfect". They feel the constant pressure to look at their best, while they are often bullied and talked about like a commodity not a real person, in the some sections of the Press and in the regular vile comments gang on Social Media.

The public eye is a cruel, critical world where people feel entitled to discuss, judge and scrutinise an individual by attacking their appearance, weight, personality, intelligence, relationship, bank balance, talent etc. whilst being expected to be a role-model to to the younger generation. Unfortunately when you're in the public eye, you don't get a 6 week course on 'How to become a Role Model'.

‘What if I am over weight’, ‘Actually my boobs are quite small’, ‘Maybe I do have short fat legs covered in cellulite’, ‘Maybe I am talentless & stupid!’, ‘Yer my face is actually quite fat’... These are actually all things I have told myself from 19 years old after appearing on reality TV and having the public directly communicate with me on social media platforms, press articles and the delightful comments underneath them! I still want to know how Sharon from Devon knows from a photo of me walking out of a restaurant that I’m ‘dull, dumb & have no friends’! 🤦🏽‍♀️

I have many close friends for who, choosing plastic surgery was a huge decision. Months, even years of research into Surgeons, multiple consultations with them, constantly checking the testimonials for that surgery & surgeon until they were absolutely sure they were making the right decision. I have to say that the surgery made them happier, built their confidence and none of them would regret it.

I think there’s is a place for surgery and Botox for some people and I’m not even ruling out that I would have either or both one day.   You would never believe the amount of offers I get for plastic surgery! 😱 But just suppose I did say yes to bigger boobs, because I'd been commented about in the media, and I felt that would shut people up. What then?    Having calmed down a bit from when I started writing this. I really think that the massive issue is low self esteem, and I think all of us who do hold influence must work together to try to change this.

We have to build women who value themselves as more than their appearance!   Only by coming from a place of valuing ourselves for who we are today, can we then make what are massive decisions like undertaking cosmetic surgery.

Lucy Mecklenburgh
Found & Fitness Guru

Lucy founded Results with Lucy to help ladies transform their health & lives. 

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  • Carol September 05, 2018

    This is such a great blog, its so sad and frustrating to see what can happen. To wish to improve your appearance is natural for, i guess most of us, but i believe we should take inspiration from someone like you, and eat healthier, follow a fitness routine if desired, be practical and happiness, wellbeing and self esteem will follow from that.

  • Natalie September 03, 2018

    I rarely read blogs and absolutely never comment but this was really well-written. I am 28 and somehow I am one of a few of my friends who is comfortable in my own skin. I watch as they facetune and edit but gladly this is as far as theyve gone and none have gone under the knife. I cannot imagine how social media and false reality is affecting teenagers and adults alike. Sometimes it helps to have perspective, instead of thinking my arms are too fat, how about spending a moment researching people born without arms. If you want to promote a healthy future, unfollow anyone you suspect is making you feel less than perfect or who you know has heavily edited/ had cosmetic help to look a certain way. I did and social media is actually a nicer place. Most importantly be kind to yourself and others

  • Kelly Pauling September 03, 2018

    Fantastic blog Lucy, fantastically wrote and I agree with every word! I fear for the kids that are growing up today with all this to influence they have to view on social media daily!! Life is too short! Beautiful is more than skin deep and there is more to life that being perfect and does perfection even exist! You are so inspiring Lucy! Thanks for sharing!!!

  • Jade September 03, 2018

    Great post, Lucy. As a mother I feel it’s my duty to make sure my kids are totally comfortable in their own skin but I have immense fear that social media may have a bigger influence on their lives. I hope that by the time my daughter is old enough to see what goes on online this ridiculous trend will have vanished without a trace and I’ll have done my job to make her feel confident with who she is x

  • Carol August 30, 2018

    And then you have magazines who think it’s acceptable to call women boring for embracing their natural bodies. It’s hard enough being an adult and accepting your body at times but can only imagine how difficult it must be being a tweenager/ teenager these days when your head is filled with such nonsense and the pressures put on them to fit into the “perfect mould”.

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